I'm not gonna lie mothers day should be good, but it's kinda hard. It doesn't help that I'm in the midst of a detox and DYING for my everyday nutrition menu again.
Being on social media is hard a lot, it's tons and tons of happy pregnancy, baby picture, family picture posts and it's really hard. REALLY HARD. But who can blame everyone. I imagine I'd be doing the same thing if I was blessed to have a child.
The detox mixed with mothers day and infertility is NO BUENO!!!!
Hal and I talked a lot about what happens if I never have kids. I refuse to hear it. I refuse to even think that is the case. I fully believe I'm meant to have children in my life. I can't help but wonder if maybe God doesn't want me to have them... but I'm pretty sure he keeps his promises and he does.
Rough day. Not much else to say.
Good Night
Showing posts with label provera. Show all posts
Showing posts with label provera. Show all posts
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
When will Rock Bottom FINALLY hit?!
Today I mark 15 months of dealing with infertility/trying to conceive etc
It's one of those days when you wake up and think it was just a dream right?? I am FINALLY here? Finally past this nightmare?
I was at the White Sox game last night and AC/DC Thunderstruck started (intro to game song) and we had used Thunderstruck when we were first introduced and Mr & Mrs Hal Weise at our wedding.... I felt an excitement when I heard the song- it reminded me of happy days. SUPER HAPPY... I should say.
Because today I am happy, but I guess I don't feel complete.... and that is super scary to say right? Aren't you suppose to feel complete? Yeah I did back then... now here I am going on 2 years of being married- not long I know but I'm also going on 31 years old and I'd like to have 2, honestly if that's all God will give me. I'd take it. And I'd like to run young with them.
You're probably wondering why I'm not discussing IVF treatments as they should've started today.
Well sadly the Insurance company has declined allowing my doctor to treat me. He's trying to make it work, but it's not looking good. I will get sent to a new facility. They decided to sub-contract out to a new treatment center and wont cover me going to him... as of right now. He is trying to help if he can.
Do you know what that is like? Honestly. I LIVE in my doctors office- I go there every other day and get greeted by my first name. They know me, I know them- my doctor CALLS me on the phone rather than me having to talk to a nurse about ANYTHING with this subject.
I've NEVER had that kind of a doctor before. And now insurance wants to take that away.
I specifically switched to this insurance just to HAVE THIS DOCTOR. I lost EVERY other doctor I EVER had because I had to switch plans to have Dr. Roth, and now I'm being told I can't even use him anymore.
Going to a new center means ALL New treatment ALL OVER- new checks- things I've already done.
I HATE INFERTILITY. I HATE MY BODY RIGHT NOW FOR THIS DISEASE
IS THIS ROCK BOTTOM OR WHAT?! Honest to God. It's hard enough to be riding this roller coaster just to have a family, it's a non-stop fight.
I believe your family will feel complete when you have one or two little ones with you and your husband/wife. It's a different kind of happy I think. What do I know. But I think it's more of a complete feeling and that super happy life... the one you thought you'd have... little did you know you'd have miscarriages and deal with infertility.
There has to be an uphill soon. right?... or maybe this isn't meant for me?
It's one of those days when you wake up and think it was just a dream right?? I am FINALLY here? Finally past this nightmare?
I was at the White Sox game last night and AC/DC Thunderstruck started (intro to game song) and we had used Thunderstruck when we were first introduced and Mr & Mrs Hal Weise at our wedding.... I felt an excitement when I heard the song- it reminded me of happy days. SUPER HAPPY... I should say.
Because today I am happy, but I guess I don't feel complete.... and that is super scary to say right? Aren't you suppose to feel complete? Yeah I did back then... now here I am going on 2 years of being married- not long I know but I'm also going on 31 years old and I'd like to have 2, honestly if that's all God will give me. I'd take it. And I'd like to run young with them.
You're probably wondering why I'm not discussing IVF treatments as they should've started today.
Well sadly the Insurance company has declined allowing my doctor to treat me. He's trying to make it work, but it's not looking good. I will get sent to a new facility. They decided to sub-contract out to a new treatment center and wont cover me going to him... as of right now. He is trying to help if he can.
Do you know what that is like? Honestly. I LIVE in my doctors office- I go there every other day and get greeted by my first name. They know me, I know them- my doctor CALLS me on the phone rather than me having to talk to a nurse about ANYTHING with this subject.
I've NEVER had that kind of a doctor before. And now insurance wants to take that away.
I specifically switched to this insurance just to HAVE THIS DOCTOR. I lost EVERY other doctor I EVER had because I had to switch plans to have Dr. Roth, and now I'm being told I can't even use him anymore.
Going to a new center means ALL New treatment ALL OVER- new checks- things I've already done.
I HATE INFERTILITY. I HATE MY BODY RIGHT NOW FOR THIS DISEASE
IS THIS ROCK BOTTOM OR WHAT?! Honest to God. It's hard enough to be riding this roller coaster just to have a family, it's a non-stop fight.
I believe your family will feel complete when you have one or two little ones with you and your husband/wife. It's a different kind of happy I think. What do I know. But I think it's more of a complete feeling and that super happy life... the one you thought you'd have... little did you know you'd have miscarriages and deal with infertility.
There has to be an uphill soon. right?... or maybe this isn't meant for me?
Sunday, April 29, 2012
IVF Broken Down
Lets talk about how IVF works, prices, process, percentages etc etc You get where I'm going with this!
PRICE!!!! Highest is $15K lowest is $7500! Insurance DOES cover THANK GOD!!!
Payment plans are available, I want to say coverage is usually 50-80% and these totals do include EVERYTHING. Now $7500 is likely JUST the IVF section, not the daily ultrasound monitoring, bloodwork, injection meds, HCG shot, progesterone ETC!
This link pretty much sums it all up! Click to read if you choose IVF DETAILS!
A couple pieces that stand out to me...
30-35% chance!
Big Risk is MULTIPLES!!!!
10lb weight gain in 3-5 days- REALLY?! Give me a break!
10lb weight gain in 3-5 days- REALLY?! Give me a break!
Sedation at the Egg Retrieval??? yikes! Seems I'll be in the hospital or doc's office for most of the day when that happens. I better make sure my phone is charged!!! Potential Bed Rest?! THIS GIRL!?!? Do they know I live and breathe fitness?!?!?!!!
Injections can be 1-4 a day for up to 10 days!!!!
More monitoring with IVF/Injections..basically I have to go to doc every day/other day depending.
OOOH exciting! My home away from home
Embryo's can be frozen for future babies.... Dear Lord I'll take 2 healthy twins or triplets- 1 and done!
I read there is a 25% chance for twins, 15% for triplets but higher for 1!
Miscarriage occurs 15% of the time- not cool.
Progesterone supps may come alone... hmmm hopefully they are the KEY!
PRICE!!!! Highest is $15K lowest is $7500! Insurance DOES cover THANK GOD!!!
Payment plans are available, I want to say coverage is usually 50-80% and these totals do include EVERYTHING. Now $7500 is likely JUST the IVF section, not the daily ultrasound monitoring, bloodwork, injection meds, HCG shot, progesterone ETC!
good lawd!
This is me being optimistic! It's worth it right!!!!
Okay so fill me in on your thoughts about IVF, experiences, and wish me luck. It's coming up SOON!
Happy Infertility Awareness Week... I think...
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