Keeping up with Injections

I missed a couple days on my updates for the injection meds so let me catch you up.


Basically with injections it goes MUCH longer than Clomid or Letrozole/Femara. You pretty much inject the meds until you get to the point to trigger ovulation. 


So today is day 7 of the injections. I went to the doc yesterday morning to check out my follicle growth... there are 3 growing on my ride side- one of which is leading big time in size. this is a benefit. Now of course if all 3 got fertilized then that means triplets who do not look alike. CRAZY to think about.  Unlikely though :)  


The doc checked my blood and called me with updates in the afternoon on dosage.


If you get these injections you will get an update every day in the afternoon of your blood level- which I'm not even going to try to explain. I don't want to confuse you.


So anyway- the doc called me to update and told me to double my dosage. I'm like good lord body can you just respond!!


I then went back to the doc today for more monitoring. You see when you're in this position you do what your body does. We run the process based on my body, not mind.


I am continuing on my double dosages for now. Back to the doc Tuesday.


The injections will make your stomach PUFF out- okay so I look FAT. haha. How else do I say it?  I'm VERY bloated and prego looking if you will. It sucks. You can feel the twinges of your ovaries growing. You can't cross your legs, you can't sit indian style, you can't bend, no lifting, no exercise except for walking or limited swimming (thank god it's summertime). 


We went to a wedding this weekend and I could not dance at the wedding, and if you know me. You know I LOVE to dance. So that was difficult to not get up and start bouncing around. 


I can't be cold/shivering. Not that one would want to be cold & shivering but it's bad for what I'm dealing with.  


I am super bummed on the fitness end because I have worked SOOOOO hard to get in shape and this is moving backwards for me.... now I have to keep reminding myself that THIS IS TEMPORARY! I will get the best gift in the world this way and I can workout all I want after :) It's a hard pill to swallow when you have worked so hard to lose weight and get in shape. 


I think overall its not so bad if you can deal with sticking yourself with needles daily. they are not too painful. Just annoying is all. 


Worst part of my weekend is that another freshly pregnant lady asked me if I was in the same boat as her... or assumed and it was like  'well no... trying..hard to explain...'


That was hard. Just because I don't have the happy news...and I still basically have to act as if I truly am pregnant- no drinking- no exercise etc etc   And naturally that sucks when we know there is NO baby YET!


BUT I truly believe there will be great news SOON!!!


xoxo

CYCLE CHANGE WHAT?!

TMI- fair warning!!! Stop reading now if you dont wanna know.

After the HSG I went home with some discomfort and was told I might see some discharge from the ink/dye and/or blood. But a light amount.

Well Sunday night a HUGE flow hit and I was like okay fair enough this is from the HSG. Fast Forward to today and I was like okay for real I still have a lot of this going on.

I called into the doc that I am now working with for the IVF/Injection procedure and they had me come in right away for an ultrasound to see what was going on. So I headed out to the doctor this afternoon and sure enough it looks as if my period is here.

Holy confusion batman!!! I swore it came on May 1st! Isn't this disease AWESOME!?!?! Apparently it's here now. They did run blood to be 100% sure that is correct. I will find out tomorrow for sure.

In the meantime they started me on my new meds- Clomid and then Gonadotrophins, also known as injections!  Oh yes. I got sent home with a DVD explaining how to give myself shots. Exciting isn't it?!
I can't wait to stick myself daily with some medicine.

But when all is said & done if a healthy baby or 2 comes out of this, then it'll be well worth it.

For now I'll leave you with this video that hopefully helps you get the idea of what goes through the mind of a person dealing with infertility. Not every single thing she writes does go through our mind but most of these do.

Mother's Day

I'm not gonna lie mothers day should be good, but it's kinda hard. It doesn't help that I'm in the midst of a detox and DYING for my everyday nutrition menu again.

Being on social media is hard a lot, it's tons and tons of happy pregnancy, baby picture, family picture posts and it's really hard. REALLY HARD. But who can blame everyone. I imagine I'd be doing the same thing if I was blessed to have a child.

The detox mixed with mothers day and infertility is NO BUENO!!!!

Hal and I talked a lot about what happens if I never have kids. I refuse to hear it. I refuse to even think that is the case. I fully believe I'm meant to have children in my life. I can't help but wonder if maybe God doesn't want me to have them... but I'm pretty sure he keeps his promises and he does.

Rough day. Not much else to say.

Good Night

HSG

Today has been REAL interesting.  Enough that I can write yet again!

I spoke about the HSG yesterday and never really explained what exactly it was.

So check it out  HSG

The doctor required it as does my insurance so lucky me. I get to have my own doctor do it. He requested I come to the hospital tomorrow for the procedure. I hear it's painful. I'm not excited. But I'll do what I have to, to have a family.

I was talking to the Verizon Wireless Rep and he wished me a Happy Mother's Day. NOT COOL! I understand the kindness but NOT COOL!  Thanks for that reminder!!!!  It's hard- I'd say it's best to not say anything at all. You never know what someone is going through and you can judge or assume.

It's a struggle like I've said,  I get a lot of people who tell ME first they are prego. It's like what do I have 'PLEASE TELL ME!!' plastered to my head?!?!

I understand that excitement for sure. I will be the SAME way when my day comes.  So I try to be happy and excited and ignore the fact that this is reality for me and IVF is waiting.

I told you yesterday that I cannot travel during these procedures because of blood flow, sitting too long, and all the monitoring. So the decision now is do I wait a month and travel or do I cancel my traveling?!

I want badly to be there for my team, for the pictures, and the memories. This is really difficult for me believe it or not.

With this disease you never know if a round is going to work or not. You never know if you're body is going to develop cysts that will scrap your round or if it will work.

I love being in the unknown. NOT!

I'm trying to enjoy this journey... really I am.

I was just thinking about how exercise has been cut from me yet I need to exercise. So I was thinking I could swim this summer. It's different, slow paced, or fast if I choose and I bet it wont affect my body! That's something to look forward to :)

Anyway- happy mothers day to those who are and those who are not keep pressing forward, one day it'll be for you too.

New Doctor

Today I met my new doctor. Well my IVF doc. I get my regular doctor back once I'm pregnant.

I think I already explained that the reason I switched my insurance was specifically to work with my current doctor. He was brand new to me and we knew it was going to be a lot of visits and treatments so we picked insurance to work with him.  Well when it was time for Injections/IVF he was told that insurance had sub-contracted out the IVF procedures to a different facility. It's not comfortable... but whatever.

So I met the new doc today after a CRAZY day.  I am doing the Ultimate Reset by Beachbody. It's a 21 day body detox, helps to remove the toxins, chemicals, crud, and fat in my body. PCOS is tied to toxins soooo perhaps this will help me! We shall see. Hal is doing it with me. Check it out Ultimate Reset

I made homemade dressing in the Magic Bullet for our salads today. When Hal poured his dressing serving he twisted the cap SO TIGHT that when I was trying to get mine out... I could not twist it back off for anything.  Detox & Medical Insurance can make a girl go crazy for real!!!  So after many attempts and my anger building up I finally broke the piece, and dressing ended up splattering all over my kitchen. I was NOT HAPPY.  On the detox you don't eat the everyday food. Now the food is great. It's a lot of salad so naturally the dressing is a big flavor you want and I dont want to cheat on this and eat a non-homemade dressing.  So I flipped out.  I understand part of this is the toxins releasing so release away!

I struggled with the insurance company as well today just learning about my benefits for IVF. Not gonna lie it might just be worth all this struggle and hassle because I am getting A LOT covered. I had read that this new doc requires payment in full before they treat you. But because of my insurance it should be all covered. So that's good to know.

This doctor is located in the hospital that I will eventually deliver at, whenever that day arrives. It was my first time at the hospital. Like I said we had switched out my old doctors and hospital for the new one who I now can't even work with. Super Annoying!

Parking at this place is a nightmare. I was in tears trying to park. I finally got into the docs office 30 minutes late. I got lost, I was so frustrated!!! But finally I got into meet this doc.

He showed me my options to move forward- but first they decided to do an HSG only to keep insurance from fighting anything. HMO is awesome for coverage but they tell you who you have to see. Hence my doc switch out of nowhere.

So tomorrow I'm supposed to get this done. I'm trying to go back to my reg doc to do it instead though so we shall see. I hear it's uncomfortable... so not looking forward to it!

From there we move to injections... sadly though I cannot travel with these procedures and I have  A LOT of traveling coming up.... I am torn on how to deal with this. Any input would be great! My traveling is for business but fun at the same time. So it's a toss up... because family is priority...so hard decisions.

This is my ultimate goal... do I wait or do I move forward?   Can't it just get easy already?! SERIOUSLY!!!!